HOW DOES MEDIATION WORK?

By Susan Healey

Although mediation is becoming more popular and mediators are being sought out by the public at greater rates than ever, a number of misconceptions about mediation still exist. Although mediation can take many forms, the type of mediation I practice is "interest based", which means that discovering and satisfying each person's interests is the aim and goal of the mediation.

Let's take a simple example. Frank and Mary are having an argument about whether to keep the window in their office open or shut. This has become a real source of tension between them, and things have escalated into shouting matches and insults being hurled. Frank and Mary come to mediation and Frank tells me his position: the window has to stay shut. Mary similarly tells me her position: the window must stay open. Like Mary and Frank, most people can easily state their positions at the beginning of the mediation. As their mediator, I don't try to find a compromise between their positions. For example, I don't start talking to them about the merits of keeping the window open or closed, or about how maybe the solution should be that it be open for part of the day and closed for the other part. In fact, I will not concentrate on their stated positions for very long.

People take positions because they have underlying concerns, values, interests and needs, which they think are best satisfied by their position. My job as the mediator is to help Mary and Frank share those concerns, values, interests and needs with one another.

Through various techniques that I use, Mary and Frank learn that Frank is terrified of contracting the West Nile virus through a mosquito bite, and that Mary suffers from environmental allergies that are alleviated by breathing fresh air. Neither had been willing to tell one another those facts because of the animosity and mistrust that had developed between them. Once they understand one another's motivations, they are able to examine all available options to decide how to best resolve one another's problems.

After discussing the different possible solutions, Mary and Frank decide to go to their employer together to request that a screen be installed on the window - a solution that they are both content with because it satisfies both of their needs. They are certain that their employer, who has already issued warnings about their office deportment, will support and fund the idea. If they had not been given the opportunity to learn about the interests underlying one another's stated positions, they may have grudgingly agreed to a compromise (the window left open a crack, for example) that ultimately would not satisfy either Frank or Mary in the long run.

Although this is an overly simplistic example, it demonstrates the basic principles underlying the mediation process: a respectful atmosphere, a constructive exchange of information about concerns, values, interests and needs, a thorough discussion about various options and their feasibility, and the participants being left with the responsibility to evaluate and choose that solution which works best for them in their particular situation.

The conflicts that I see as a mediator are far more serious and complex than Mary and Frank's, but if approached using the basic principles outlined above, most can be resolved or alleviated if participants are motivated to find a resolution that is a win/win for all concerned.